Top 25 reasons not to eat your own hand
1.) You're a vegetarian
2.) You're really not that hungry
3.) You're on a diet
4.) You just ate someone else's and you're full now
5.) If you ate it, then who would you talk to?
6.) You've always wanted to be a pianist
7.) You don't know where it's been
8.) It smells funny
9.) It would really cut down on your typing speed
10.) You're busy eating your foot
11.) If you ate it, you could only count to 5
12.) It's hard to play video games with only 1 hand
13.) You can't fit your hand in your mouth
14.) You prefer chicken fingers
15.) People would think you were odd
16.) You're out of ketchup
17.) You can't do 1 handed pushups
18.) Your insurance doesn't cover that sort of thing
19.) You don't want people to think you are like crazy uncle Fred
20.) You lost your dentures
21.) Your doctor advised against it
22.) You were going to, but you can't find it in the fridge
23.) Someone else already ate it
24.) You're allergic
25.) You don't want to share it with the people next to you